I am not a professor, I am a student of the world. I don’t have a PhD in education, I have a PhD in life. And, I look at the state of affairs in this world, and I have wondered how we became such a lost and broken society.
This is where my answers have landed.
Women’s rights. I am not saying that women don’t have a right to be equal, we do. But, have we given up the very equality we so desperately perceived ourselves not to have???
Let’s look at the world since women’s rights became an issue. These are the socio-economic factors I have began to believe I understand.
Women went to work, and suddenly our time was scarce. We no longer had the time to tend to our children, so daycares became the answer. First, they were other homemakers caring for children while their parents worked, but as more women entered the workforce, daycare centers became a dime a dozen. Who is going to treat and teach your children the values you feel are important? The only people who are fully capable of this are the parents.
Since the women’s rights movement became a complete and total rally of success, we have lost so much. And the biggest break down is morality.
Though it seems like such a long time ago, it wasn’t. I am of a seriously transitional generation. My grandmother was a stay at home mother who raised six children. My mother was a working mother who raised 4, and I am somewhere in between the two worlds. I dabble in a bit of both, mostly out of necessity. This world requires two incomes, but why??? That is the biggest question I had to answer.
Women in the home just 50 years ago, had a tendency to create a community with their neighbors. One woman would garden, preserve and share the fruits of her labor. She utilized this skill to feed her family and keep the costs of the supplies needing to be purchased to a lower cost. How, by growing the fruits and vegetables necessary to feed her family. Now, does everyone have a green thumb? No. That is where community came in. The woman who gardened, she could trade for other skills she did not possess. Let’s say she could grow the food, but didn’t have the skills to cook it up to the level of delicious fashion that her neighbor down the street could. An arrangement could be met, I will give you ingredients if you teach me how to cook like that. Whoa, people working together for a common goal. Add the neighbor next door that can sew. What could she bring to the mix? And thus, community was formed.
Women are the backbone of society. We are the mothers of the earth. We are the moral compass, and yet, we have become so divided over what is wrong, that we can’t see the solutions staring us in the face. We have become too focused on our own identities, that we have lost the ability to fully see where we fit in the larger whole.
When women were at home, the crime rate was much lower. Teen pregnancy, though it existed was lower. Children were taken care of and the community was the safe haven to allow them to grow and learn. Our community is broken, and we are what is missing.
Men have always been the ones to go out, earn a meal, whether by their own bare hands with hunting and gathering, or by the sweat of their brow for a dollars wage. This is their role in this world and in the family. Women took on the responsibility of provider-ship, and began screaming at the top of their lungs, “I don’t need a man to make it in this world!” Yet, that is the natural order of things, and it is. It takes the combining of a man and a woman to create something that is precious and beautiful and the best thing that has ever happened to me. Children.
What is broken is the society that our children now grow up in. We send them off to daycare, then school, then college, and say ok, it’s time to be an adult and take care of yourself. But, we forget how much we are paying to outsource jobs of the household in order for women to work.
Childcare, food preparation and supplies, laundry, cleaning (the maid business is a booming industry), clothing, and so much more.
IT used to be cheaper to make your own clothes than to purchase them from a store. This is very backwards, as you are the one putting the labor into the items, yet it cost more money to make your own clothes? How is this not backwards? We have foods that are no longer wholesome and nutritious, we have a guaranteed heart attack in a box if you eat enough of it. We buy clothes only to need a specialty cleaners to clean them? Why?
All of these things is knowledge we have begun to lost, and have allowed to be taken from us because we have become a society that is taking the “easy life” for granted. Life has never been easy, but we have lost the skill to believe in the ability to fix what is broke, feed what is hungry, nurture what is hurting, and so much more. We have turned to drugs to make us happy, when the reason it seems most aren’t, is the crop in which they sewed their life.
Do I need a man in my life, no, not really. I am capable of making it in this world without one. We always have been. How many frontier women have you read about? What was always the key to survival if the husband died or became lame? Community and a gritting belief that the children can not go without the needs that are so important. And the most important is love.
Now, back to a little history.
Life was not easy when I was a child, but it was the community of family that made sure survival occurred. My aunt and grandmother grew a garden in their back yard. My grandmother sewed my clothes, and I loved them! The world was my oyster and she would make anything I designed. It taught me imagination coming to fruition.
My mom, the woman who is most directly responsible for the woman I have become today, she persevered. She overcame every hardship and always made sure that her children had food to eat, clothes to wear, and a warm bed to sleep. I never went without. I had her love, her compassion, and her strength, and I still do. So much so, that I believe I am capable of starting a conversation over what it would take to make the world a better place.
Love. It’s really that simple. We don’t have to judge one another to feel better about ourselves. We have lost the community, and by doing that, we have lost society. Our children have grown up tended to by TV’s, Xbox and internet. Look at what they are being taught. Women, take off your clothes and parade around because the only value you have is what someone sees when you are naked. We forgot that we are soulful human beings that have a deep desire to love, and be loved in return. Every person on this planet desires that. It doesn’t matter if you disagree about how they live their lifestyle, whether it be a man loving a man, or a woman loving a man. Life is hard enough without throwing harsh judgment into the mix. Yes, there are certain moralities that must exist for everyone to co-exist. That is the area in which the world has become so gray.
Michael Jackson said it best: I’m starting with the man in the mirror, I’m asking him to change his ways. No message could be made any clearer, if you want to make the world a better place, then take a look at yourself and make that change.
We have stopped seeing our own potential for flaws, and our own potential for growth, and that has been the biggest contributor to society as a whole. It became me, instead of we. It became a world of selfish, self centered, angry people, and I became the leading word. We, we are the world, we are the home, we are the hearth, we are the hope. When it’s we, and we agree on the lines of do not cross, we get a long so much better. Problem is, we have lost sight of where that line begins and a personal responsibility to morality ends.
I hope for the world, unfortunately, hope does not seem to be the light that all are guiding their hearts with. Because beyond hope, lies the seed of love.
Perhaps putting the heart back in the home is the solution we need so badly. Maybe fathers would see their value and mothers not feel so overburdened with the responsibilities that their children get sent off to a machine to give the time necessary to get things done. We need to learn to work together again. Fix what is broken, and that, starts with family. Heal the family unit, and then begin to heal society.